Lori Walsh: If you're struggling with addiction, avoiding isolation can be a daily act of self care. So what if suddenly you're forced to self isolate to save lives including your own? Joe Tlustos is a peer addiction management coach for Face It Together Sioux Falls. He's joining us today for a look at the challenges of addiction recovery during a pandemic. Joe, welcome to In The Moment. Thanks for being here.
Joe Tlustos: Well, thank you, Lori. Glad to be here.
Lori Walsh: Tell us a little bit about Face It Together as an organization before we get into sort of the challenges that are facing people today.
Joe Tlustos: Sure. Face It Together was started here in Sioux Falls about 10 and a half years ago after a series of town halls that were gathered together to talk about the subject of addiction and what could the community do to help serve those needs and were there places that were not being reached, people that were not being reached? A lot has happened between that 10 and a half years ago. But since that time, Face It has been seeing and talking with clients all over the place. We now have locations here and in Denver and in Fargo and Bismarck and Grand Forks, North Dakota. And so that's where we are today.
Lori Walsh: Tell us a little bit about how broad those services are, what kinds of addictions that you're able to work with people on.
Joe Tlustos: Our approach to addiction management is really based around the peer. I often will tell people, and I don't know if you're supposed to start this way, but I'll say, "Okay, here's what I'm not. I'm not a counselor. I'm not a licensed therapist. I'm not a doctor. What I am is a peer, someone who has been through the process, who has been in recovery for an extended amount of time, and somebody who's just kind of been there, who has gone over the bumps and the ups and the downs and maybe have learned a few things along the way." And so it's not a totally new approach, but it's one I think that's gaining a lot of steam and it seems to work for a lot of people who other traditional means maybe haven't worked so well. That's kind of the basis where we're at.
I think also what's nice about it is that it ends up being very cost effective. It's a very low cost process. And we can talk about that later, that that's where one of the real holes is in the addiction set up is if you have resources and health insurance, you have options. If you don't have resources and don't have health insurance, then the options are quite a bit smaller. But we can talk about that later. So where we fit into the big picture is that. We're not a 12-step based program, which would be the AA style type of program, although we welcome that and anybody else, wherever they are. We're of the opinion that there are a lot of ways to get to recovery and it's a matter of finding those pieces and those things that work for the individual. It's not the same for every person. Every person comes in with their own set of circumstances and history and all of those things. And part of our job is to try to get down to that, what's really going on and how can we help them.
Are we for everybody? No. And there's no one way to do this. Certainly we come from a place where, and certainly in the medical community there's pretty much a hundred percent agreement, that addiction is an illness. And we like to think of our process as helping people regain their wellness, their wellbeing. And so we often will say that it doesn't stop with becoming sober. That's kind of where you start. It's how do you find your way to regaining your life, regaining control of your life, and also enjoying your life and figuring out what are the things that I need to put together to do it?
As far as what addictions we serve, just about anything that's substance-based, whether it be alcohol, other drugs, just about any kind. We also act as a referral service. Because like I said before, I'm not a doctor, I don't diagnose anyone, anything like that. But we are a place where people, when they come in, we can to some extent triage them and help steer them towards mental health professionals or other medical professionals, things of that nature. So the whole idea of addiction is not a one size fits all thing. And we try to fill those niches that maybe haven't been there before, but from the perspective of somebody that's been there.
Lori Walsh: If you're just tuning in, my guest is Joe Tlustos here on In The Moment. He's a peer addiction management coach for Face It Together Sioux Falls. And Joe, every story is different. There is no one size fits all, with the possible exception of a pandemic when one pressure lands on everybody at the same time, although it lands on people in different ways. You might be a medical professional going to work in an ER today. You might be out of work at this moment. You might be homeschooling your child or helping your child access online learning at this moment. Lots of different pressures, but all coming from the same source. So let's talk about some of the challenges that you're seeing in your work immediately from just the very nature of this kind of disruption, the anxiety and fear people are feeling, and the isolation.
Joe Tlustos: Absolutely. These are some things I think I've learned about. Not every person's the same, but there are some commonalities that come in. Number one, just about everybody that comes through our door is actually pretty smart. Lack of intelligence is not an issue. But what is an issue is that two of the worst factors, two of the most powerful contributing factors to addiction are isolation and boredom. They are dangerous. When you're by yourself and you have time on your hands, that usually is a bad place to be. You start living in your head and then you start going places where you don't want to go. Well, that is right up against the time when we're all told to what? We're told to isolate ourselves where we are. And for many people that means I have a lot of time on my hands. Certainly a lot of people working from home and doing other things, but there's also a lot of people who are idle.
So all of a sudden, right now you're in the probably worst environment or potentially worst environment you can be in, that you're isolated and you're bored and you might be anxious or scared or fearful. And you kind of go, "Okay, I'm supposed to do the right thing. What is the right thing here?" And that could be a real challenge for some people. And that's where we've had to, and others certainly too, have had to adjust our game, or I guess in our case more accurately is pick up other parts of our game which we have been using but using them now to a greater extent. And that is primarily video coaching, where we can be face to face. And and there is something to that, and I think a lot of us are learning that during this time that while being face to face with people in the flesh is preferable, even being face to face on a live video feed is better than silence.
And there is power with the tools that are available, power in being there and at times being on with a number of different people. We can talk about groups later on. But it's a tool that we've had, and partially because we're in South Dakota and I've always thought of South Dakota as a great big small town with really long streets. And sometimes those streets are a long way from any kind of professional help when it comes to battling with addiction. So being able to communicate long distance but face to face has been a tool that we've used quite a bit, but not like we are now. Now we're doing it many, many times a day.
So it's changing and it's different. Anytime you do any kind of... You know this being in the communications business, anytime something changes from a communication style of standpoint, things change a little bit. But I think everybody's adapting really pretty well to do in the video and face to face. It helps that the tools are as good as they are. But yeah, it's really extended the reach too of who we can talk to, and maybe more importantly getting the message to people who are in an isolated rural situation that they have these options. It's probably the toughest part of all is to let them know we're here. It's free right now, everything that we do is free, one of the things that we've done until the end of May, I've decided to do that. And that we're here and then as long as you have a decent broadband connection, we're here to help you.
Lori Walsh: Tell us about the peer recovery groups and how that's done in a group setting. How do you manage that?
Joe Tlustos: Well, it's kind of new for us because most of our work up to this point has been one-on-one. People historically would come to the center, they'd be with the coach, we try to match up our coaches with a client, based on personality, background, do the best that we can there. And we go into a room and we spend 45 to 50 minutes together. Where the groups come in is we figured that, and other people have figured this out too, is that a lot of people who are used to being in a group environment, whether it's a nightly meeting or it might be intensive outpatient treatment, they're used to being around people. And that people part in that sharing part is and certainly can be a very powerful part of the recovery process. Seeing that you're not alone, seeing that you're not unique, seeing that other people are having the same struggles that you are.
So we figured that while there were a lot of groups that were starting to come online, there probably wasn't a group quite like ours and with our broad philosophy of how to work on addiction. So with the power of... We started using Zoom. We now offer seven different hour-long groups that are open to anybody anywhere. Four of those groups are working with people who are either in recovery themselves or seeking recovery for themselves. The other branch, and it's a big part of what we do at Face It, we're kind of ahead of the curve here now, it's working with loved ones, working with those people who have people in their lives who are battling addictions and have tried everything in the world to help, and they want to help, but it's what do you do? Especially if you have a person who's... A lot of times people who battle with addiction have certain personality types and things of that nature. And people really care, they want to help, but there's no instruction manual that comes with that.
So three of our groups are with what we call loved ones. And those groups we have found in person, we've done some or we've hosted some groups before at our center that that can be a very, very bonding process. But when you can't get together face to face because of social distancing and things of that nature, we have implemented the tools of Zoom that allow us to talk to several people at once and to have them talk to each other. I had my first group on Wednesday, two days ago, and I had people from Sioux Falls and [inaudible 00:20:09]. I had a guy from New York. I had a person from St. Paul who was on. Young and old and we can all see each other, and we had a really great conversation and different perspectives on what people are going through. Some of it I'm just really acting as kind of a moderator and a traffic director.
But it's that sharing portion while you can't be there in person, and it's a real tough deal for a hugger and some of us do a lot of that. But it really works amazingly well because everybody can see everybody. If you choose to. If you want to be anonymous, you can turn your camera off. If you don't really want to talk or want to listen, you turn your microphone off. It actually is a pretty effective tool. And I know that whatever normal looks like on the other side, and I know that there's not a lot of agreement on exactly what that's going to be, I think the experience has shown us that these tools, these video tools, really have promise and really may open up some, not only geographic spaces, and certainly, because that's obvious, but I think it might also add to the process.
Lori Walsh: I want to jump in here, Joe, before I let you go, to get beyond the process here and really speak to some people who are listening right now. And they can go to faceittogether.org, they can find you on Facebook and they can tap into the resources. But for people who are just listening, maybe they don't have an internet connection and this is the only thing that they're going to hear all week about managing addiction. Give us some practical skills to manage addiction right now when you're isolated and when you're anxious and afraid. What are some of those things you can speak to those people through your experience directly that's really important to them right now?
Joe Tlustos: And a lot of it's great basic stuff. And I think not only for addiction, but for anybody who's going through the process. Number one, there are a lot of people who are scared, afraid, not sure what to do. It's always important to remember that there are things in life that we have control over and there are things in life that we do not have control over, although that doesn't stop us from worrying about those things quite often. So it's important to remember the difference between what you have control over and what you don't, and concentrate on the things that you can affect. It's a great big world. It's a great, big, scary place. Nobody knows how it's going to go. Sometimes we can't do anything or not do much about that, but we can do things as individuals. So that's a big thing.
Number two, as we've been talking, find a way to not be alone. Take your eye isolation physically seriously, but find ways, reconnect with people. One of the things that I stress, and this is whether we're in this situation or not, is bad things happen to people. There are things that we don't expect to see happening and they can be very tough to deal with, but I always say turn it over kind of like it's like summertime when you turn your pillow over because it's cool on the other side, look for that opportunity. Look for something in there that has presented itself that maybe you didn't take the time for or make the time for beforehand.
I got a good story. I have a client who's a musician, and of course his world, he has nowhere to play. If you're going to play in front of groups of people live, those opportunities are not there. But he said here's how he's going about thinking about this, and I was really proud of him for bringing it up. He said, "What I can do is we can get the band together to practice.' They're a little three-piece band. "And we can record those practices. I spend time then going through them, listening, taking notes, we get together again the next time, we work through those corrections, work on some new songs. The point being is that when we come out on the other side, there's going to be a whole lot of people looking to get out, whenever that is." And he said, "We want to be the most ready, tightest band you've ever heard, so that when we are ready to go in mid-season form because there'll be demand." So it's looking for opportunities to do those things. Maybe it's reading, maybe you're in a-
Lori Walsh: So control the things that you can control, connect in the ways that you can connect. Give us a third one before we say goodbye.
Joe Tlustos: Oh my. How do we narrow it down? There are so many. So much of this is I think based on honesty. That's a big part of getting through the addiction process. And that starts with being honest with yourself. And honesty is hard and patience is hard and slowing down is hard sometimes. I've run into a lot of people, we have things in common, we like to go fast, we like to think fast, and we like to physically go fast. We don't always think about before we jump into things. So take this time to focus on you. Take the time since you've been put into a position where you kind of have to slow down, learn it, enjoy it. Take the time. If you haven't planned out things for your life, maybe you've wanted to work on a business plan on something, maybe you've been meaning to read the books, but I don't take time. Maybe it's time that I don't normally get to spend with the family in the house, your children, your spouse, your partner, whoever. Look for those things that you know you should do and that need to do to be better, but you never take the time for, and take that time. If you have time, make the most of that time. Do the things that will enrich you, that will keep you focused on good things, and whenever possible, keep you in touch with people.
Lori Walsh: Joe Tlustos is a peer addiction management coach for Face It Together. And you can find more about Face It Together at wefaceittogether.org. Joe, thank you so much. We appreciate your time.
Joe Tlustos: Sure. Anytime. Thank you, Lori.